Music to My Ears

Winter break!

Home sweet home. Dad started playing the piano, which happens only once a year at most, and everyone joined in singing some praise. He showed off his ability to play any song by ear (having had no classical training), and had us name any song so he could play it. Obviously, we suggested the most difficult songs we could think of to which he responded with "no fair" but ended up playing it anyway. I guess it makes sense that noon is perfect pitch and I got the leftovers. After a couple songs, mom and noon got bored and left to do their own thing while I stayed behind to humor dad. He started playing an unfamiliar song and I asked him what it was. He told me he had composed and published a few children songs back in the days. I already knew this, but this time I was intrigued and wanted know more. In particular, I wanted to know how he wrote the songs. According to dad, he woke up in the middle of the night one day with the music and lyrics in his head so he ran to the piano, played it, and wrote everything down. Talk about instant inspiration... or not. The lyrics were based on a bible verse he was recently meditating on and going over. The tune was reminiscent of a childhood lullaby - a child calling a father. It was a snapshot of his life, at least in part, in musical form.

I found these old gospel song books at home. I found them shoved and forsaken in the back of my closet. They're about the size of a big index card and they contain songs in both Korean and English with notes and chords for each song. My goal is to revive lost melodies and lyrics and have them speak to my life; these are the stories and testimonies of people who have come before me with a passion to lift up the name of Jesus in their lives. It's a snapshot of the season of life they were traveling through. A snippet of a story. Some notes are legatos with tears. Others are staccatos of joy. There must be a reason behind their melody, their words, their longing to praise Jesus in mourning or dancing, in sorrow or joy. These souls are so stayed on their source of hope that their hearts cry out in musical form. I want to see past the dots and lines, and hear their true laments and worship to God. Maybe I can learn even a little more about God.

I used to think I needed to "feel it" and doing anything purposeful to get that spark was "fake." It's like sitting in a car and waiting for the engine to turn on because using a key seems too methodical, thought out, and even legalistic. Stupid I is. Now I know I'm not going to sit around waiting for the light bulb to go off because inspiration is a result of inspired activity. I'm not talking about music anymore. I'm talking about my walk with Jesus. And simply knowing the One Inspired Act is not enough. Frustration comes when I don't see myself growing in Christ just as when I don't get the 'awakening' in writing a song. It's about doing the homework, doing my part, cranking the engine, living a life that is worthy of a song. The question is when that snapshot is taken in my life will I have a song about Jesus? or a song about the world?

His Song keeps me moving.