Journey

Life is full of adventure only if you are willing to get lost once in awhile. If you have full control of a roller coaster ride then it's no fun at all because there is amusement and intrigue in the unknown. Adventure is innately spontaneous and therein lies its appeal to the average Indiana John Doe, the part-time backyard archaeologist. The Robinson Crusoes and the Peter Pans of our culture are highly idolized as those who take risks and have fun while doing so. The masses long for the kind of adventure that takes them beyond their limited scope while making sure their scope stays limited once they return. That's when they realize that a simple adventure does not satisfy. They need a journey.

Life is in fact not full, but only sparsely sprinkled with adventure while the entirety of life is a journey. Once you are back from an adventure, you remain the same. You may have pictures to prove where you've been and what you've done, souvenirs to remind you of the good times you had, but once you're back in the comforts of home, nothing has changed and it's life as you know it. On the other hand, a journey changes who you are - your character and identity. You cannot ever be the same again or go back to the old ways of life because what you've experienced on the journey has profoundly impacted your will, your thoughts, and emotions. The paradigm shift no matter how slight becomes the constant tick-tock of a life that's maturing and moving forward in the renewing of the mind. Without it, a life withers and dries and lacks the nourishment of an abundant life. Like growing without growing pains. If an adventure is an unknown roller coaster, a journey is a free fall from space - you don't know where you will land or if you will even survive. Now it may sound like I'm splitting hairs to compare an adventure and a journey, but if you had only one piece of hair, you would use Rogaine then it's quite an important hair to split. Two people can experience the same waterfall, but for one it becomes a light adventure and for another it becomes an epic journey. The main difference is not particularly where or what kind of experience one had (though it plays a significant role), but rather, it's what happens on the inside that changes an adventure into a journey. Perspective. To be more specific, perspective on the cost of the journey. Sacrifice.

A church member at Redeemer was once inspired by Tim Keller's apparent passion for the Lord of the Rings and decided to give it a try. He researched and found that The Hobbit was a prequel to the LOTR trilogy so he began with that one. The Hobbit (which, interestingly enough, has the original subtitle of "There and Back Again") is about Bilbo Baggins, who is the uncle of Frodo Baggins, the main protagonist of the LOTR trilogy. Well, after reading The Hobbit this member didn't find the book interesting, only amusing and even considered putting a halt to his LOTR excursion. Perhaps he didn't see it as epic as Keller did, but in any case he brought this up to Keller. That's when Keller explained that one has to first read the trilogy before the prequel and clarified the difference between the two.

The Hobbit is an adventure. Bilbo Baggins travels outside of his hometown and goes through many death-defying experiences, but once he's back even with the souvenirs of treasures and of course the ring, it's back to the usual life in the Shire (although he finds out he has some broken relationships due to his extended leave). However, the LOTR is a journey. Frodo travels through great lengths to destroy the ring, but once the mission is accomplished, it's not the usual happily ever after. "Frodo cannot escape the pain of his wounds, having been stabbed by the Witch-king and poisoned by Shelob." He does not remain at home but departs for the Undying Lands away from the Shire. He will never be the same again. His life will never be "normal" again. The journey has radically changed him from the inside out.

Perspective. Sacrifice. The proof of our encounter with Jesus is a radically changed life - a new creation - not the old life plus Jesus, but the life of Christ invading and permeating our lives from the inside out through a living, loving Counselor taking up residence in us. We can sit around all day and challenge our brothers and sisters, "Are you seeing from God's perspective or yours?" and "What is it costing you to follow Jesus?" But to the average Christian, it's just that, a challenge. It may become another exciting and even passionate adventure with Jesus, but after the spiritual high and the last night of retreat is over, it's right back to the old ways of life. With our lips we pray, "Lead us up the mountain" while our hearts demand, "just as long as we don't have to climb."

An adventure with Jesus might leave you satisfied with temporary treasures and a ring, but a journey with Jesus gives you an everlasting life of love and joy after the "I do." The beauty of our relationship with Jesus is when we don't even realize we are picking up the cross and following after him. It's when we are zealously captivated and enamored by His love for us. So we keep on pressing on, getting back up and keep on running not paying attention to what might happen to us. Wounds, pains, heartache, sickness, hardship, turmoil, storms, confusion, homelessness, persecution, and death means NOTHING when we realize that Jesus is EVERYTHING. And in this journey of loving Jesus more and more, we may have scars that may never heal on this side of heaven, but the moment we see Jesus face to face and see all His scars He took on for us we'll be able to say as we fall into His gentle, loving embrace, "It was all worth it."

You are so worthy Jesus. You are so worth it.

Objection

⁹ “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. ¹⁰ If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love. ¹¹ I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. ¹² My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. ¹³ Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. ¹⁴ You are my friends if you do what I command. ¹⁵ I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. ¹⁶ You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. ¹⁷ This is my command: Love each other.

John 15:9-17

Father

This morning the family woke up super early and drove down to Torrance. We visited some places and met with some people and ate a hearty breakfast at Ruby's near the pier. Then we walked past a huge yacht parking lot into a nice luxury hotel lobby to digest while watching a bunch of seals sunbathing on a big ol' raft. We also spotted some baby sting rays the size of my hand (가오리 "ga-o-ri" - definitely sounds cuter in Korean) and a swarm of righteous baby crabs standing on the rock(s). I would have had sea food tonight if mom didn't stop me from jumping the fence all three times. The weather was breezy and good times were easy. Mom, noon, and the deacon left early so I was left with dad.

We went to eat at the deacon's restaurant where we talked a lot about the future and the soon and coming events/decisions that may change many lives. Hope in the midst of uncertainty. And I thought this was the moment I can finally show him that I had become a man. A mature, reliable, trustworthy man. So I placed my hands on my lap, kung fu style, looked him in the eye and said, "Appa, you can count on me." Then he gave me a puzzled looked and said, "Why would I count you?" (sounds funnier in Konglish). I didn't even bother explaining it. Mission not accomplished.

Recently, I've had the blessing of teaching (or leading as some nakers insist) a group of six elementary kids at church. During one prayer service we went around as a group to share prayer requests, as many as they wanted to share. When we were done, I learned that 4 out of 6 of them come from a divorced background and live with single mothers or step dads. During night service where any child could lift up a prayer request, 5 out 7 prayer requests were prayers for their fathers. I was more shocked than heart-broken. I realized that having both a loving mother and a loving father under one loving household was a minority, and even then there were always cracks in the walls. Having taken my family for granted, it never occurred to me that I was actually outnumbered among my peers and my students.

I've heard people say that the relationship between a child and the father affects how a child relates to and approaches God. Unfortunately, there is no such thing as a perfect man, a perfect father. More and more I'm learning how sensitive of a topic it is for many people to talk about their daddy, even for Russell in Up, and even for myself. It seems overlooked at first only because beneath the surface there's a pain that is deeper and darker that many try to hide and forget.

"But because of his great love for us, God..."

Fortunately, we have a heavenly Father who loves us with an unconditional, never ending, perfect love. Just as our lives have been and are affected (good or bad) by our relationships with people, we are healed and restored by our relationship with Him. This is redemption. He gives us His Son Jesus Christ. He gives us everlasting life. He forgives our sins. He clothes us in His righteousness. He fills us with His Spirit. He secures us with His promise. He picks us up when we fall again and again. He catches us in His deep embrace. He carries us in our troubles. He heals us in our pain. He leads us into green pastures. He counsels us in our confusion. He beckons us when we're tired. He delights in us regardless. He gives us the hope of eternity with Him. He gives us eternity with Him. period. He meets us where our fathers cannot. He is what the world is not. And above all else, through Jesus, we hear our Father say to us, "This is my child, whom I love."

How deep the Father's love for us

How vast beyond all measure

That He should give His only Son

To make a wretch His treasure

via davegibbons

More

It's coming back. The words that kept me running hard after Love. Before that though, I must paint the background of this marathon journey - this "journey of loving Him more."

There's a reason why the international student shed tears today when she listened to her English classmates share about the struggles, frustrations, and ultimately, the new-found joy and peace in their walk with God. All this was in a language that she was not familiar with in an environment that she is trying her best to adjust to yet she understood just enough. She understood not just in her mind, but in her soul. Something cried out, "Abba Father" within her as she listened to her siblings in Christ cry out, "Where are you, Father?" She couldn't explain why. Her only response was, "I listen... and... make me cry. Sorry."

There's the study of God, then there is God Himself. There's the study of self, then there is self itself. Amidst the meanings lost in translation, both can mean the same thing or total opposites of each other. Nevertheless, when all the discussions are in and the curtains are closed there is still that child with her heart in her hands seeking true love, seeking true rescue from all that causes drought in her soul. "Who will restore my broken heart?" This is the point of departure - the point where we find real skin and real blood. It is the point where God meets us where we are just as a father meets the child on his knees.

Echoing the cries of King David, sometimes I don't feel it. Sometimes I don't see it. But I look at His perfect track record and I see that His love is unfailing, His mercy is never ending, and His faithfulness is great. I will ask like King David, "Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me?" and in the same breath I will say with him, "Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God."

This is no time to write out my own life story just to see how I'm doing and where I'm going. The scope is greater than that. And this brings me back to the words that kindled the fuel in me to run through the valley, past the Forrest, and up the mountain all to follow Love:

There must be more.

There must be more - more than me, me in the world, me in Christ, me in church, me in my family, me with friends, me as a student, me in a good school, me as a worker, me as a parent, me in six figures, me in my worries, me with a car, me with shoes on, me with cherry on top, me with do and sol, me in the middle, me as myself. There must be more than empty words and broken promises. More than cycles of lost and found. More than sorrows and joy. More than tears and smiles. More than weddings and funerals. More than life itself.

It's all about Him. This run is all about Jesus Christ and His righteousness. His tears for a world that is not familiar with Him among people who are hostile to Him are what causes the ark to rise above the flood. He doesn't understand just enough, he understands fully. He calls out every tear by its name and every smile by His name. And it's because of Him we approach "Abba" with freedom and confidence. Jesus is more than enough.

When you realize that Jesus is all you have you will soon discover that Jesus is all you need.

- Somebody Somewhere

All of You is more than enough for all of me

For every thirst and every need

You satisfy me with Your love

And all I have in you is more than enough

Seek Love

Seek
Seek my face
Seek my face with all your heart
Look into my eyes and tell me what you see
Closer now. Closer, until we are face to face
See your reflection in the apple of my eye
See the "little man in my eye"
If only you would see yourself the way I see you
You would be standing tall and walking forward
You would be pressing on and forgetting what is behind
You would be bold in prayer and strong in faith
You would be joyful always and filled with peace
You would be still in the storms and calm in the waves
You would be strong and courageous and never terrified
You would be steadfast and unshaken
You would be provided and protected
You would say, "Not my way but your way"
You would love me and love my people
You would love me
You would love
Love
Love me
Love me with all your heart
Look into my heart and tell me what you see
Closer now. Closer, until you feel my heartbeat
Feel your reflection in the center of my heart
Feel from the "bottom of my heart"
If you are after my own heart
I will be your shepherd and your guide
I will be your counselor and your healer
I will be your intercessor and mountain-mover
I will be your joy and strength
I will be your prince of peace
I will be your comforter and be with you always
I will be your firm foundation
I will be your daily bread and everlasting portion
I will say, "Seek and you will find"
I will love you and love my people
I will love you
I will love

Love

I am Love

If you will draw near to me

I will draw my love in your heart
I will allow yours to break for what breaks mine
I will show you through my son
You will know how much I love you

If you will come so close to me

I will fill you with my vision
I will allow you to see what I see in you
I will see you through my son
You will see that I love you
I love you, my child
I love you

Journey the Journal

From the Negev he went from place to place until he came to Bethel, to the place between Bethel and Ai where his tent had been earlier and where he had first built an altar. There Abram called on the name of the Lord. 

Genesis 13:3-4

Sometimes God takes us through seasons where it seems like all our efforts and struggles have ended in full circle and we have not made any progress. Don't be discouraged because it's not about the journey. It's about the journal - the internal, personal heart's struggle with the Person of Jesus Christ. It's not about how many steps we take, but rather with whom we are taking those steps. And when we realize, just as Abraham did, that our walk and our intimacy with God is progress and growth itself we will begin to find ourselves "calling on the name of the Lord" perfectly satisfied in His presence. First Love. So the next time you find yourself between Bethel and Ai, simply look to Jesus, the author and perfecter of our salvation.

Happy One-More-Year-Closer-to-His-Return Year!

Morning

The steadfast Love of the Lord never changes

His mercies never come to an end

They are new every morning

New every morning

Great is Thy faithfulness, O Lord

Great is Thy faithfulness

Bubble Love

I was planning on going to Fresh 09, but ended up accompanying dad to "sharing festival." Our mission was to spy on them to see how they set up the event so we can use some ideas when we do ours for CEF next month. Unfortunately, we got there right at closing time when everyone was cleaning up. Fortunately, we still wandered around and observed. We realized YN has major man power (and now three whole blocks) and that ours is probably going to be 1/25 in scale. Though I still have my eyes on those inflatable jumping houses.

The church brought back memories. VBS, choir, Tijuana, seminars. Since then, they have further built and expanded their empire. It's incredible. I feel like I'm in the pyramids. Seriously, I even think the church asked the city to make a special green arrow left turn on their street, and that bridge into C-town is probably church property too, and those factory looking buildings nearby are where they hand make bread and wine for communion and research and develop vbs body worship and crank out bibles of every language and produce missionaries who will fulfill kingdom purposes. "I am Missionary T2000. He'll be back." The church has so many resources at the tip of their fingers. Unbelievable. How do you keep all that in check in the midst of (and on top of shepherding) thousands upon thousands in the flock? Hm.

bloop bloop

I'm thinking of bubbles. Its edges are fortified from within to keep things out. There is a sign in them that reads "Comfort Zone" right above a crossed out "Fellowship." Everyone inside is smiling, but everyone outside is not. The bubbles grow larger and invade new territories, but are never affected by outside forces, neither do they ever affect their foreign obstacles. The crowd around it grows like a cloud forming from vent up rain. Safe. Warning. Caution. Danger. Caution. Warning. Safe. Warning. Caution. Danger. Soon the inevitable. Inescapable. Needles drop and the bubbles pop. Suddenly there is no difference between outside and inside. Superficial rainbows kept the soapy spheres hardened with pride. Religion fades like distant tongues within evanescent smiles and what remains is an orphan, a widow, a compromised man. Who in the cold stream will have a heart of yielding clay? Who in the flood will have a heart to build an ark? Bubbles pop. Hearts stop. But Love never fails.

Does the Lord delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices

as much as in obeying the voice of the Lord?

To obey is better than sacrifice,

and to heed is better than the fat of rams.

1 Samuel 15:22

Sharing is Loving 2

"What would my Father in heaven say of me?" not "What would people think of me?"

We say with our mouths that God's mission is to seek and save the lost, but in our actions we keep hiding the lost from a faith that Jesus calls child-like. We go on and on about the rules and regulations of "hide n seek" when God simply says He will seek those who are lost and hidden. By the end of the foreword to the gospel message, salvation in Jesus Christ becomes merely an academic exercise that only the top scholars and instructors and scribes can share due to their knowledge and expertise and experience. Then out of a sense of duty we begin to rely on our own wisdom to lead someone to the true Wisdom of God. Versions of the word turn into diversions from the enemy to create divisions in theology that lead straight to secondaries, tertiaries, all the way down to the study of the bond between bone and marrow and its relationship to God without ever thinking of moving the muscle called "faith" that leads to the Author of the Word Himself. When it finally comes time to share the Good News, we (at least among my peers) do not feel ready enough or good enough or godly enough or experienced enough, and with all the discouragement wrapped up as a gift with yellow "caution" ribbons all over it every soul treads fearfully and cowardly as we share the news that is supposed to bring about the joy of salvation. By the end of the "presentation" the curtains close and the spectators are left without a way to present themselves before a holy God. The words spoken to them are cold and textbook-like. They leave with even more doubt or worse yet, a false sense of salvation.

"Do I care?" "Do I love?"

From God. By God. In terms of experience, the apostle Paul himself began to preach the Gospel only days after his conversion. "And immediately he proclaimed Jesus in the synagogues, saying, "He is the Son of God." I am of the opinion that sharing is not a skill we can hone and master, but rather an attitude we must choose to bear. In order to share, we must have, and what we have is the power of God for salvation. Sharing is simply extending out our arms out and giving to another. Sacrifice. When we share the free gift of salvation it's about freely giving what we have freely received. And to think/say that brother/sister so and so is not fit or ready already puts us in a seat of judgment, one that requires us to be the judge (or more accurately, the doubter) of their salvation because to share means to have what you share. And to think/say that "I" am not fit or ready requires a personal scrutiny of our relationship with God that goes beyond "I think God loves me." because believe or not, Christians are called to share the Gospel. Now that sounds radical. Too extreme. Too intense. Too hardcore. Too difficult. Too much sacrifice. Too passionate. Too much time. Too not-for-me-more-for-them. Too impossible. But God reminds us it is the Holy Spirit who lives in us who gives us the conviction, the courage, and the words to go out and become true witnesses for Christ. It's not about me. It's all about Jesus. Surely God will take care of the salvation of His children.

Great conviction. Great Compassion. Great Commission. I hold on dearly to these convictions so that next time there's not a single bit of uncertainty or guilt or man's opinion that disqualifies me for the mission of leading souls to Christ, which every child in His name is called to do. I also hold on dearly to the grace and mercy that God pours out upon me as I turn to Him with a heart of repentance, knowing that God is still faithful. I have a familiar feeling this won't be the end of it, but it's high time to put down the instruction manual and start following what it says.

I took Chris back to the pastor's wife. "He's good to go!"

I thanked her and thanked God for the second chance.

Sharing is Loving

Sharing is Loving 1

"Did he accept Jesus Christ?"

That was the first thing she said to me.

And my heart was pierced and sunk to my stomach. I stared into her eyes as she wiped a tear from her cheek. I replied in hesitation. "Possibly." I looked at my student and then back at the pastor's wife and said, "Can you please give me 5 minutes?" She nodded.

I took Chris behind the basketball court away from the chaos of children in exile and began an excursion of our own into the depth of our hearts. I had my Wordless Book ready and I shared the message of salvation. He seemed familiar with the news, as if he had seen it in a church play once, but didn't know the details. When we got to the white page I asked, "Would you like to receive Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior?" he nodded quietly. When we prayed together my heart was gripped with a grace that moved my convictions, making them intense to the point of sorrowful guilt then making me sense the complete freedom from a guilty conscience.

Throughout the cef children's camp none of my students raised their hand to receive Christ at the end of the message. Assumptions were high and despite my years of experience at camp I lost sight of the importance of sharing the Gospel to every single child under my care. I truly know the Gospel was preached throughout the camp and through Pastor Daniel's messages - there was no doubt in that. There was doubt, however, in whether or not each child that God entrusted to me had an opportunity to ACCEPT Jesus Christ not just hear about Him. I felt my conscience roundhouse kicking me in the head even as I thought to myself "they're all from church so they'll probably get it someday." In light of "doing it right" I left out doing it Righteous, and that's where my true convictions lied.

In the end, I know it is up to God to grow the seed we have sown. But I also know that this isn't a license to go into battle halfheartedly then come out with an applause for every soldier for the sake of phony 'feel good encouragements' and 'keeping the peace' and 'ending on good notes.' What needs to be rooted out must be rooted out - no matter how painful and destructive and unpopular it is - before it spreads, infects, and stunts not only one person's growth but also his or her brothers and sisters in Christ. I can already imagine (and know of) a child growing up with everyone around him, including himself, assuming and learning that He is saved because he went to church or he went to camp and then later realizing he was never a child of God in the first place. "I never knew you."

Footprints in the Sand

The walk of a snail. But slow and steady wins the race. Here's a little update for the uptake. I am under heavy pressure right now. But pressure is diamond. bling*

College you've been good to me. They say it's real life from here on out. I say omg. But friends and fan-mily, I do not worry. My mind is clear as if I've poured out my thoughts into a Pensieve. I look back and memories are distant, but Love is nearer than ever.

I had a dream the other day. I was in a room with fellow students and I felt this uncomfortable sense of urgency - as if I had procrastinated for a lab report that was due in one hour, which I had not started. Unfortunately, that was the exact scenario of my dream. This felt so real and I remember thinking that I was going to die and never graduate, and in my state of panic I shoved my lab partners out of their seats so I could finish everything on my own. "Get outta here!"

When I woke up and realized I was at home on my bed I couldn't help but smile real big and stupid-like. "It's over!" That's when it hit me big time - I am done with college! 17 grace-saturated years in the making (including kindergarten my favorite) and it's finally over. WIN!



Just like Fisher's smile at 0:43. It's the smile of knowing that victory is here. You know the outcome before the income. You see the finish line and it's the final stretch. No more pacing. No more tracing the dotted line. No more trailing behind. No more sulking about past faults and mistakes. You just smile because of Jesus and only look to finishing the race. this. is. CAKETOWN!

.

so.

now what?

Now I look back into the Pensieve because I accidentally poured out all my thoughts and I can't remember a single thing... ah, there we go.

For the time being this boy is headed to seminary. Lord willing, I'm aiming for Talbot. I dread the application process because I've dreaded every application process before it. My life is laid bare before the admissions office and scrutinized based on my past achievements and my merit. "Wait, but I heard... everyone gets into seminary." uh, whatever. I pray this will go smoothly and quickly.

Let's see here what else do I remember. Yes. I now have an ice cream. She is pretty cool, but not as cool as luigi.

ew don't touch me.

This will be one grand adventure. I see two sets of footprints in the sand, but our desire is we'll only see One as He carries us through and through. Rules and regulations out of love and honor because Love came down and rescued me.

Here's another memory that's fresh in my mind that I hope can encourage. After a fun filled day at magic mountain with a few of my friends I came home and slept around 2 am. Before going to sleep I prayed, "God, I'm super tired, but remember how I said I wanted to go to morning prayer everyday from now on? Well, I give up because you know how bad I am at waking up. So I give it up to You! Thank You." So I set my alarm to 5 am since mp is at 5:30. That night I had a dream and during the dream I woke up naturally, which is very rare considering I slept so late after a long day. And I said, "If the alarm goes off right now, then I'm going no matter what. If not, then good night world." And the very next second - BEEEEEEEEEEEP~!

OH MY....... LORD I WILL GO! SEND ME! HERE I AM!

So God led me to a blessed time at morning prayer! Praise the Lord!

Let's keep the summer cool for Jesus~ <3>

Got Love?

Oh, how He LOVES us! This song is so powerful. It's so raw - like a child trying to describe God's love. Abandoned to Your praise! YEA!

And I realize just how beautiful You are
And how great your affections are for me

I don't have time to maintain these regrets
When I think about the way...

He loves us!

And that's how it starts.

Daddy is jealous over us so don't make Holy Spirit grieve over our sins because we'll be in a mess when we realize the King Himself has been rejected, has stepped down from His throne to run to us, and took up our cross to embrace us. This is LOVE.

But it can't end there with mere words or else we're no better than a useless clanging cymbal.

People are in need of deliverance and a deliverer. People need the Lord. We all need Jesus. So badly. We need to become more sensitive to HS's calling to intercede for and reach out to one another. Broken, empty hearts are standing next to us and walking by us. Downcast souls are masked by smiles. Burdened shoulders carry the weight of family issues. Distraught minds are entrapped by past memories. Name calling. Habitual sins. Physical abuse. Wandering eyes search for a purpose or at least a job just to get by. Life is holding on thirstily to the hope of an abundant life that quenches eternally - True life in Jesus Christ. Only a true encounter with God's perfect Love through His Word, His Son, His Spirit can resurrect and resuscitate the lost and backslidden! We commit our lives because of and through the Life God has committed for us and given to us.

If you feel like "I never got love," it's absolutely vital to have (or remember) the correct biblical view of God. "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." Justice has been served through Jesus Christ. This is Truth. There is no sin that is too great for God to forgive no matter how much you think you've consciously disobeyed God. Jonah. That's what's up. And if that was not true, then Jesus' death on the cross and His resurrection means nothing. Jesus came to seek and save that which was lost. So KNOW that you fit the requirement to receive God's beautiful grace and mercy. KNOW that Jesus actually died in place of you. KNOW that God has removed your sins as far as the east is from the west. KNOW that God's love has never failed anybody, except Jesus Christ, His only son, so that you and I can experience His unfailing love. KNOW that He has promised His children to take them Home. KNOW that he leaves the 99 behind to go after the 1 lost sheep. KNOW that God is running after you, takes great delight in you, rejoices over you with singing, and quiets you with His love.

And for those who feel like "I got love," it's your duty to give that love away. If all you're doing is smiling about how good life has been, how much love you got from your parents and others and thinking "I must be a lucky one. God blessed me." then consider yourself the most selfish, wicked, vile person on earth. You're holding onto a barrel full of fresh water and rejoicing over it all the while staring right into the eyes of a withering man parched and dying of thirst. Yes, salvation belongs to God, but if that's your excuse for never getting down to pray for whom you consider 'unlovable' and in dire need, never reaching out your hand for the sick and weary, and never sharing Jesus Christ, the Living Water, then that's bad theology - and that's when I say (bad) theology is not important when all it does is sits in your head and never travels to your heart. Does your heart break for broken hearts? Are you willing to take in everything that a person is, the pretty and the ugly, or do you treat people like a buffet? Do you have the hope and assurance that the Gospel transforms and changes lives and God uses YOU to do exactly that? Is your LOVE motivated by God's Love or by whatever sympathy you can muster up in your heart for others? If you've been loved on so much and God has shown you His great love throughout your life, it's only because you are called to share and give it ALL away and become the lowest of low, just as Jesus showed us. It's ALL about living for and loving God and living for and loving others.

Because no matter how good (or bad) you have it you cannot live for yourself. We weren't made that way. It's impossible. If life was about self-improvement, reaching self-enlightenment, receiving good karma based on personal, individual deeds, and becoming a better you then NO ONE would care about peace, friendship, marriage, children, orphans, widows, the hungry, and all of social injustice and relationships because anyone apart from you would simply be a stepping stone to get where you WANT.

But in Christ and only in Him, Jesus became the stepping ROCK on which we stand to get where we NEED, not by our own merits or accomplishments, but by the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, our friend, our brother, our lover, our Savior, our God.

KNOW the love of HS embracing you so dearly. This is not just a feeling. This is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. This is Jesus Christ.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 4:29-32

Got Love?

God's Love.

Dove

I am updating in a very unconventional way. I am quite excited for what is ahead of me - hopeful for what is yet unseen.

We shall see or we shall sow the seed. Regardless, God is so good. Our God is an awesome God. Our God is LOVE. love. love.

ABC to XYZ

If you are living for yourself, you've lost your mind.

Live for God. Live for others.

Love God. Love people.

-

Harbor Retreat was very cool beans!

Here are some thoughts:

Many people say it's not about what you believe. It's about what you do and how you live that matters. What they forget is that YOU DO WHAT YOU BELIEVE. FAITH proceeds ACTIONS. What you believe makes you who you are. "Christian attributes" don't save you. Your faith in Jesus Christ is salvation. FAITH and LOVE. How?

Organized religion? Far from it. It's called faith in action. How do you expect to obey an invisible God if you can barely get along with people right next to you? The church is and should be the greatest tangible example to the world.

So then why do you take the easy way out? At the first sign of trouble, you run away. The amount of difficulties has now become proportional to the amount of empty seats.

But we don't want to look bad so we justify ourselves and say, "What does it matter? That's just how it is. I don't know. Whatever goes. It's bad, but not that bad. What can you do about it?" We forcibly make short ends meet and we don't realize that the wires have disconnected from the socket.

But Grace extends where we fall short. It's time to realize that God will never 'disconnect' you. It's time to realize that the power is already there. It's the same power that raised Jesus from the dead. That power lives in us by the Holy Spirit. He says YOU CAN. He says YOU ARE. Free to love. Free to live abundantly. This is life folks. Unity in diversity - spelled out in church community. FAITH and LOVE.

"Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us. By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit."

First step. Gospel. Last step. Gospel.

Odyssey with God

There are times when I search fervently and chase after the supernatural. These are times when I am disappointed. I look for things in the physical and neglect the things in the spiritual. These are also times of hope and encouragement when God reminds me of who I am in His love. He gives me the strength to keep moving forward.

This morning I received my allowance in an unusually small envelope.

He says to me, "You're not even trying to find a job are you?"

To that I reply, "God provides!"

And we both smile.

Dad goes back to the his room to consult with mom in choosing his tie. I check the contents of the recycled envelope and I begin to calculate the tithe. It takes a while for me realize that I just need to cross out the zeros. Math and I had a falling out of some sort, but I digress. I turn the envelope over and I see messy scribbles in Korean. It reads "Child Evangelism Fellowship" and on the bottom in light pencil - "Pastor's car."

-

It's easy to for me to forget that the life I have is supernatural. The breath I breathe is a miracle. In my good times and bad times, my attitude should never be one of apathy or discontentment. There should never be a time when I simply shrug my shoulders and say "whatever" because that would be to reject and neglect who I am in Jesus Christ and what I have received from Him. When I say God is my provider I say it sitting with the family around the dining table with empty bowls watching a father's tear fall on empty plates in place of where the food should be. When I say money comes last and doesn't even place in God's kingdom I say it with a roof over my head and a bed to lay my head. When I say live only for God I say it holding the hand of a man in a ragged suit with one ragged bible in his other hand and a family by his side who is filled with love, joy, and peace. When I say only Jesus I say it with visions of grandeur so steadfast that I know I'll set a Gospel fire with this torch from heaven and change the world.

And I remind myself,

Why wouldn't a supernatural God work in a supernatural way? I want to be intimate with a God who is LOVE. Sins are meant to be dealt with, so deal with them quick. Jesus breath. Jesus blood. Jesus resurrection. Jesus revival. Social construct and unity is meaningless without Spirit and truth and without God's purpose at heart. Be careful what I see and touch. Don't let the wrong kind of fire suffocate my dreams. I want to pray for the sick and see them healed. I want to reap the harvest and live for God's glory. I want my words to speak of Love and point all hearts to Jesus. I want to see His peace and restoration in broken lives. I want my experiences grounded in God's Word. I want my spiritual eyes to open wide. I want the power of God to flow though me. I want God's love to overflow. Stop the talking. Show me what you got with your actions. See me fall off the ledge and see if I'm still alive. Offensive. Defensive. Mindful of others, yet only mindful of God. LOVE. It's time to press on.

-

I hear dad coming out of the room. The tie has been chosen. I don't like it, but that's because I have no fashion sense at all. I turn over the envelope one last time and I give all my thanks and praise to my Heavenly Dad. I say bye to my earthly dad. Kisses and hugs to mom and me.

Then he leaves for work in his brand new Odyssey.

Drive the Clouds

Hush now

It's not your turn now

Wait for the moonlight

It's your only spotlight

You are in no place

to stand like Barnabas

when you talk like Judas

with empty words and promises

Let's get to it.

I am truly encouraged by the steps you take, the Words you put up, and the hope that you have. As you lift up the name of Jesus in your life, I am heavily affected to lift His name up in my life. I find it so strange how that works. You may not realize it at those particular moments, but when the dust settles and the sun shines through, Jesus is the centerpiece to whom we are connected as one. One.

If we are one in Jesus Christ, then we are one in Jesus Christ. It sounds like a pretty simple thing that should embrace and not push away. But when a brother says "john, you get it, but I don't," I just want to punch him... like kool-aid. Speaking of which, perhaps the red fluid will be a reminder of who we are IN CHRIST and not IN THE WORLD. Foolish mortal. MORTAAAAL KOMBAAAAT! Your death will be spiky needles! and coughing up red blood cells!

All this people pointing (and punching) is to hide the fact that my heart has gotten colder to those who choose to live in a dark cloud of dejection, comparing themselves to lighter, brighter clouds who, in their eyes, seem to have it all or better together. That is, I've gotten colder to myself. As I see it reflected in those around me, I begin to feel hopeless thinking "Eh, whatever, let God deal with them and do His thing. I don't want to have anything to do with it... Payce!" It's the easy thing to do as PKai put it. Then the Word comes alive and pierces my heart... but then I dodge it - woosh - 2 Fast, 2 Righteous. hahaha. But, in the end it gets me! agh! touché!

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.
1 John 3:16

The dark clouds who've been through the storm and the rain, down trodden with sins and sorrows - the ones who feel jealous of better lives and feel like they lack something need to remember that they will be the ones who can pour out the most. I see it as a greater potential to love even more - in God's love - as healing and medning of brokenness and forgiveness takes place. Once His children realize that we are all under one sun, or... One Son (ooohhh), then the shades of cloudiness begin to fade away and only His glory is left to shine through, pour down, and love all around. Glory in the highest.

I'm imagining this cloud who is smiling, moving softly across the sky to another cloud that is sad and crying, and then it gives it a big cloudy hug. *poof* and now both of them are smiling.

I'm not gay. I just like clouds okay?... and rainbow colored unicorn fairies...

Love perfectly. Love all the way. We love because He first loved us!

I need a BIG HEART. BA-DUM BA-DUM! <<<333!