Fishing

Watch this if you're hot because I get the chills every time.

Cowaballin'

So I was ballin' up some foos at my high school courts recently. Then a couple of guys they were up to................ about my height, maybe a little taller, and they challenged me and jcha to 2 on 2. "Alright. Ya'll look like you missed Valentines... cuz I'mma crush you!" said the inner yeoman. First game: We lost 6 to 11. whatevers. I wasn't even trying, but I admit, I was furiously disappointed that we lost. So we ran it back. Second game: We were up 10 to 6 and I was like"YEEEE game point SUUUCKKAAAAS!!!"

thenwelost.

Assuming that there is not another game right after, usually what happens is the winning team lingers on the court and shoots around like they just claimed mad monopoly territory. It also proves that they still have so much energy left (but really they're barely hanging by a thread called pride). It's the street ball version of dog pee pee. It stinks. The losing team, on the other hand, drags their sorry bottoms to the sidelines to drink from the one pity-bottle that one guy brought for himself, but now has no choice but to share the shame with his fellow non-winners.

All this to say,

I hate losing (basketball games especially) with a passion. It might be because of the traumatic loss in my little league finals in middle school, but that's another story for anever time. The only difference between me and the guy hurling the ball across the court is I'm hurling my heart across my chest - I hold it all inside. I say the guy doing the hulk smash is more honest in a strange, twisted way. Really, I do, but in the end, both end up as sore losers. No one likes to admit it, but the things we get most worked up and passionate about tend to be the things we put most our value and worth into - whether it's a win or lose or neutral. "If I'm good at this, then people will acknowledge me or acknowledge me more."

But there's a golden lining in the clouds because losing (in most cases) leads to a strong desire to win (hopefully, unless you like losing... you lewser). "I hate losing! I'm going to win next time! BERSERKER BARRAGE!*" This is why the word comeback resonates with so many people, nay, everyone because everyone has lost at one point in their lives. Yes, even Chuck. wut.

There is an overall sense of resolve to do something about not losing next time if there even is a next time to pwn those kids on the court, or wherever/whatever you consider your "court" to be. "I'm gonna run more and build up Superman stamina. I'm gonna work out like 300 and then squish them with my evil eye. I'm gonna ownage pwnage fo shonage!" Or for students, "I'm gonna go to every lecture 2 hours early and stay behind 2 hours after! I'm gonna destroy the makers of facebook and tetris friends! I'm gonna make a 9th floor in Geisel library with just my brain p-p-p-p-powerrrr!" Or of course if you were thinking what I was thinking, "I don't want to lose to that temptation again! I'm gonna read my bible 366 times this year! [Insert spiritual discipline here!]" etc.

Looking back at my track record, however, "I'm going to do better" is like saying "I'm going to fly." (Even as I write this, my strong resolve to win next time around is beginning to relax its muscles compared to right after the game when I wanted to run laps on the track). Of course, there is a way to fly but only with HS Airlines. My own efforts at improvement are like splashes in a puddle or a chasing after the wind, while his words alone calm the raging storms into stillness. Transformation happens only when the puddle is totally imbibed by the storm and wholly captivated by the stillness - when my will is surrendered to his will. So I take my loss to the cross because my identity is not found in my loss but in the One who carried the cross.

In short, fiery resolve doesn't have to involve whipping out the claws and ripping off heads. Rather, true resolve flows steadily with the river and carves grand canyons on the way to its destination. Next stop, ocean. Slow and steady does it.

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I like turtles

or tortoises.

Life In 3D, pt. 2

"Jesus is risen!"

In my freshman year of college I visited the Rock church in San Diego on Easter. I remember as soon as I got out of the car, a man in a highlighted traffic vest greeted me saying, "Jesus is risen!" He pumped his fists, gave a huge smile, and shook my hand. My response was, "Hi-... He-.... You-... We-... Ame-.........." and unable to find a proper reply in my ESL database, I simply smiled and nodded enthusiastically like a tourist who wanted to desperately prove that he understood. Then he went right back to directing traffic and greeting people in the parking lot. For some reason, that made such a lasting impression on me. He is risen indeed.

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Therefore, I urge you brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God - this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will.

It begins with the mind. Certainly, we aim for the heart to give birth to godly action which then matures into a God-pleasing life style. If we were to look back to what the early Christians might have had on their minds, perhaps these reminders are not too far from reality:

Live as if Jesus died yesterday. Last year at children's camp, a kid asked, "If Jesus died a long time ago, why do we have to believe in him now?" It's easy to lose the significance of an event that happened 2000 years ago, especially if it is supposed to affect our lives today. When we truly remember that Jesus lived the life we should have lived and died the death we should have died, the godly sorrow will produce a life of repentance. By God's unconditional Love and Grace, the price for our sins has been paid and we have been bought with His blood. We wouldn't think twice about doing something Jesus had to die for. Conviction would be word. He died for you so live for Him.

Live as if Jesus rose again today. Imagine that you were one of the first people to come back from Jesus' empty tomb just this morning. omG. When we realize that Jesus has conquered all our sins, risen above death, and has made us holy and righteous before God, the godly joy will surely lead to a life of thanksgiving and praise. We wouldn't wait a day, a second, to tell the closest person about Jesus coming back to life! The Good News will be so real in our lives that we would share it with everyone we knew. He is risen so be His witness.

Live as if Jesus is coming back tomorrow. Many of us have read and heard about Jesus' return so many times, even encouraging us at times, but again, our lives seem to say, "What are the chances that it's tomorrow, or this year, or maybe even my lifetime?" A friend of mine once told me that the first thing he prays and thinks about when he wakes up is, "If tomorrow was my last day on earth, what would I do differently today?" (similar to my homie Eddie's resolution #7. crazy). Lifestyle. When we live our lives in expectancy for Jesus to return and take us Home, the godly hope will bear a life of perseverance. No amount of suffering will compare to the glory yet to be seen. No matter how tough it gets, no matter how heavy our cross may seem to be, we will be able to follow Him, "forgetting what lies behind and straining toward what lies ahead." He is coming back so press on.

"And what I say to you I say to all: Stay awake."

If this sounds impossible, it's because it is - on our own, that is. But praise be to God who has made us alive with Jesus Christ and has given us His Holy Spirit to live out life like it was meant to be lived.

"Check the History book, He's the One to do it.

Lived, died, rose, got the holes to prove it."

And that's Life in 3 days.

Life In 3D, pt. 1

Last night during dinner, dad told me about a sermon he heard recently. I stayed at the table after dinner and 2 whole sets of desserts (first strawberries, then Veggie Straws) because he was so inspired by it that he was pretty much "passionately speaking" (coughpreachingcough) in between mouthfuls - not uncommon at the table. So here is the same inspiration chewed and digested and processed in my system. Hopefully it's not shhhhhhhhheer nonsense:

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There's a difference between words and actions. We might say we believe one thing, but many times our actions reveal true unbelief. The in-yo-face way of putting it is, "inaction is unbelief." The kumbaya way of saying it is "It's a process so chin up and keep trying. It takes time to believe." Pick your weapon(s). I'm the last person to talk about a Christian's tendency to become complacent and comfortable especially in a Goldilocks environment that is just right - one foot in the Word and the other in the world. It has been hammered out by fiery men like John Piper, and Christians have all at one point been called out to "pick up the cross and follow." Unfortunately, the chasm between words (where I should be) and actions (where I am), or "sanctification gap" as some in academia call it, is embedded into the psyche of all who desire to obey, but find themselves pulling out the same list of resolutions at the end of the year, or worse, find themselves with new lists, ambitions, and priorities that fit their lifestyles perfectly, or rather, too conveniently.

What will it take for Christians in the 21st century to fully and radically (compared to their peers) live for God alone just as the followers of Jesus Christ did spreading the Gospel like wildfire in the 1st century? Ultimately, the Holy Spirit must stir, shape, and send the living sacrifices set apart for Him to submit to God's plan and purpose in this life and in all of creation. It will take many biblical truths, much obedience in them, and complete reliance on the HS to break, soften, and mold the calloused hearts of the "disciples" in a generation that has 21 more things that try to steal the heart away. It will take more than mere words, aspirations, or inspirations. It will take life in its entirety.

To be continued...

Midnight Flight

I am up because I need my medical meds

Today is the last day I take prescription pez

Two more pills and I'm out the door

Two more kills and the Strep steps no more

It's the red pill or the red pill

Catch 22 plus 6 more until

My wings grow back without the red bull

My strings go crack and become audible

Wake up at 6

Pick up the morning sticks

Eat again at 12

Lay down in my cell

Dinner at 6 again

My stomach is a pig pen

Then I stay up until the end

when I finally say amen

And repeat

Eat, eat, eat

Put it on my tweet

Wheat, wheat, wheat

and rice to be complete

I've learned a lesson

from all this special dining

Shut up and stop whining

Always give thanks

for the ultimate Healing

For faith is more than a

ipod touch

slide to power off

Trial after Victory

hya hya!

Round 1

Last night I was sitting in on the Good News Club (GNC) teacher's training hosted by CEF. As the pastor was giving us a message, I was led to pray and praise and give thanks (in my seat, on my own). I was filled with His joy as every Word dropped like honey. Then...

"John! Why are you touching your lips like that?" whispered noon who was sitting right next to me. Before I knew it I was giving her the coldest stare in the universe of DC comics. Then I semi-rolled my eyes, took 3 scoots away from her chair, and started picking at my lips again (a bad habit I picked up from who knows where). I was angry at her for "ruining my moment" but I knew on the spot (as I was giving her the I-can't-see-you-from-the-corner-of-my-eye treatment), that it was completely my mistake. I was all worked up because of nothing she said, but because of my short comings and how I reacted to what she said. And only His Word will be the last word.

Round 2

After the GNC meeting I was driving home and once again I was giving God the praise and thanksgiving and having a revival service in my car (also for teaching me and correcting to me in round 1). I got off the freeway and I was going up the street when a bmw who was up to no good, started making trouble in my neighborhood. I was ahead on the right lane and signaled left, but for half a block this guy was teasing me (benefit of the doubt: he was probably hesitating whether to pass me or let me enter). Every time I sped up to make my move he would match my speed, and whenever I slowed down to get behind him he would also match my speed. He finally hit the gas and sped up to pass me. Right then, I stopped praying and glared to my left to freeze him with my eyes as he passed by. It was an old lady looking ahead without a care in the world...

Again, I realized what I had done as soon as the car passed me. haaaaaaaa (that's the sound of a deep mournful sigh). My prayers quickly turned into repentance. Only His Word will be the last word.

Round 3

This morning at church, I put my keys in the ignition to start my engine. kekekekekeke* =D kekekekekeke* =O kekekekekeke* =| kekekekeke*! -_- Helga wouldn't start. It was like she was snickering at me. kekeke. "Don't get me started Helga!" Since this was right after morning prayer, I got fired up and began to cry out and intercede for Helga while gripping the steering wheel super tightly like it was Lazarus' mummified head. kekekekeke* haaaaaaa. More than anything, I was frustrated at God thinking, "Why now? Why after a wonderful time at morning prayer? C'mon now!" honk*

This happened and that happened and finally PT jump started my car and suggested I go straight home or to a body shop because it's likely that the battery is out. I chose option two and got a new battery. And PT was right. At the body shop the mechanic switched the engine on and off about 4 times and Helga was out. That's right. If God had miraculously started my car when I prayed and I stopped my car again, I could have been stranded in a worse situation. He allowed me to take out the root of the problem instead of trimming for a temporary solution. If only I could have seen that, I would have been peacefully eating the fruit of patience instead of choking on whine and cheese.

Continue? 10. 9. 8. 7...

Lesson learned, get some more coins and keep on playing praying.

Jesus' Victory > my victory

My victory had blinded me.

My pride had destroyed me.

But His humility rescued me

from every trial and temptation.

So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall!

1 Corinthians 10:12